Why most people quit learning a language, and how to trick yourself into not quitting

There are many people who start learning a different language. They give it a go and then they quit. They might do that a few times across their life or over the past few years, and you might relate. If you know the most common reasons people stop, you can counteract them, and that increases the chance of reaching your language goals. I'm James, I'm a native English speaker, and I can speak Spanish and Italian.

1. Learning at the wrong level

The input level you decide to learn at is more important than you might think. You have to learn at a level slightly above what you're used to, so it pushes you and you don't get bored. If it's too difficult, you give up because it seems too hard. It's a bit like a carrot dangling above you. You want the carrot close enough that it feels reachable, but not so far away that you don't want to start.

So use a different method depending on your level:

• Beginner: language apps like Duolingo or Memrise are super useful. They teach you the basic phrases and sentences to get you going. Don't focus on grammar and structure right from the start. You want content that's exciting and interesting to you and relevant in the real world. Ideally you learn something you can take out into the real world and speak to a native speaker with straight away, and get proof to yourself that it works. If you say "the bill, please" in Spanish at a restaurant and they go "oh yeah, no problem", that's evidence.
• Almost conversational, or more advanced: you might be learning stuff that's too easy. On Duolingo you might be learning man, woman, cat, dog, basic words that don't get you to a conversational level. But also make sure you're not trying to listen to TV shows in Spanish with Spanish subtitles and Spanish audio while not understanding what's happening. You have to be able to understand and stay emotionally invested in whatever content you're consuming to get your brain used to the language.

2. No feedback loop

If you're early on, you might not have a lot of feedback that you're making progress. One of the big motivators is that we can see ourselves at least getting better. That applies to the gym or any hobby, like playing an instrument. To keep going at something, you have to see that the time and effort and energy you're putting in is paying off to some extent.

It's hard to track language learning because there's no metrics behind it, no numbers. So you have to pick little successes. If you spoke for five minutes completely in your target language and last month you couldn't, that's a success. Track every little win and make the feedback loop as quick as possible. Compare yourself this week to what you could do last week.

3. Running out of motivation

You might relate to this one a lot. When people decide to start learning a language, they're motivated and inspired. They've listened to a friend speaking fluently in a different language and thought, "Actually, I wouldn't mind being like that." They go home and download an app or start learning some material. That might last a few days or a few weeks, and then they can't see any massive progress so they give up, or other things in life take priority. They're no longer in that emotional state they were in when they got inspired. They don't really care anymore.

The solution is not to think "I'm going to learn this language because I'm motivated". The key is to do a language learning activity as part of your routine and make it habitual, rather than "I want to learn Spanish now, let's get a pen and paper".

• In the shower, listen to the radio or a podcast in your target language.
• When you're driving to work or commuting, listen to a podcast.

You'll find it more natural to do it as part of your routine, because you'll be doing it anyway.

4. Methods that don't fit how you learn

The methods you use can often be disconnected from how you learn. You might like to have a pen and paper and write notes. Or you might prefer to have conversations with native speakers. It depends on what you find most fun. If you find reading and writing most fun and that's how you want to learn, that's fine. Pick the method that appeals to you most and that you find most exciting, because that gives you the best chance of doing it long term, rather than the first week and then giving up because you don't like it.

To finish

Those are the most common reasons people quit. If you can understand how to overcome them, you give yourself the best chance of not giving up. And consistency is most important with language learning. If you keep at it for long enough, you'll see progress, you'll feel good about it, that will motivate you even more, and then it's a cycle from that point onwards.